You’d think that once someone gets a partner, they’d delete their dating apps. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. Here are 11 signs your guy’s still checking other people out so you can GTFO of the relationship.
He likes his options. If he’s the type of guy who always talks about his need to have options in the rest of his life, it might make you worry that he’s still doing that when it comes to dating. This is especially the case if he was dating other women around the time you two got together. Maybe you know for a fact that he had loads of different dating apps when he met you. Who’s to say that he’s deleted them all?
You met on a dating app. And even though you became exclusive and official, he never mentioned canceling his subscription. Hmm. He might not be on the app anymore but it would make you feel more secure if he told you that he wasn’t.
When you ask him if he’s no longer on the app, he gets weird. If you tell him you’ve deleted your dating app and ask if he’s done the same, he doesn’t give you a straight answer or he changes the subject. WTF? He might really raise your blood pressure by saying something stupid like, “I even forgot about that app on my phone! I should log in and delete my account…” Ya think?
He’s getting notifications on his phone. He never used to get lots of messages on his phone but lately his phone’s firing up a storm. Worse, it sounds like different notification sounds compared to other features on his phone, like emails and texts. It does make you think… While getting notifications on his phone shouldn’t immediately make you worry, it is quite telling if they’re a new occurrence.
He doesn’t answer texts around you. When his phone beeps like crazy, he ignores his phone instead of reaching over and checking his messages when you’re both chilling together. He might even grab his phone and take it with him to the bathroom so he can check it in private. Geez.
He doesn’t change his relationship status on social media. If he’s shady about changing his relationship status on social media, it might make you worry he’s keeping his options open. He might still be on a dating app, or he could have some real-life options that he wants to keep warm in case things don’t work out with you. Either way, it’s shady as hell.
He suddenly has lots of new Facebook friends. They’re all women and they seem to have come out of nowhere. The guy’s always with you, so you know he hasn’t been meeting them all through work or at the club. Maybe he’s meeting them on dating apps and then adding them on social media. Hmm, maybe that’s the real reason why he won’t change his relationship status to say you’re his girlfriend.
He freaks out when you use his phone. You needed to use his phone because yours ran out of data and when you reached for it, he freaked out. Any time a guy makes a huge deal about his phone or laptop, you have to wonder what’s on there to make him act so dramatic. And no, you weren’t snooping.
Your friend saw him on a dating app. Yikes, this one is probably one of the hardest pills to swallow. If your single friend was checking out a dating app and stumbled upon your boyfriend’s profile, that’s a sign something shady is up. And don’t believe him when he says he just hasn’t had the time to delete his profile. That’s such BS! If he really wanted to get rid of it, he would’ve done so by now. Even a dormant dating app profile can point to trouble. Is he keeping it there so that he can re-activate it when he wants to, perhaps sometime in future when things aren’t so fab between you two?
A dating notification came up on his phone. You glanced at his beeping phone and happened to see a notification from Tinder or some other dating app on it. Ugh. It doesn’t get more obvious than this one. He’s seeing someone else.
He doesn’t have a good reason for being on there. Although it’s clear that he’s receiving notifications from a dating app based on the above point, he might try to give you a legit reason for why the dating app is on his phone. Maybe he’s a writer who’s writing dating articles about online dating. But if something like this is true, you’d know. Besides, you should be with someone who’s open with you about why they’re still checking out dating apps. If you’re just finding out about this now and the excuse seems like a badly thought-out lie, it’s a huge red flag. Swipe left on this a-hole.
Giulia is a freelance writer living in Johannesburg, South Africa. She writes for local and international websites, with a special interest in writing about dating. In her spare time, she can be found blissed out in a bookstore or writing fiction of her own. She loves Oscar Wilde, organic beauty products and Italian food.